Aita for showing up where my husband was supposed to be

15M subscribers in the AmItheAsshole community. He does the same thing for me when I want to go to some weird vegan restaurant. (2) I might be the ah for showing up without telling him and since he said he didn't feel comfortable with me being there and needed space. She also has food allergies. Over my last year, my (f39) husband (m32) has been obsessed with his YouTube fitness channel and how he looks. Saturday morning, the worst happened - my sister was involved in a serious car wreck. However, this does require a strict nighttime Suspicious_Exam_3842. She’s on life support, it’s touch and go and I’m devastated. My husband (m 35) and I (f 33) have been married almost 10 years. I (34F) have been with my husband (41M) for 15 years and married for 11 years of those years. For me it’s a sign of caring tbh. NTA, he's clearly gaslighting you and probably trying to starve you to death. He invited over his mother and niece. I (24f) gave birth to my daughter six months ago and it should've been the happiest moment in my life. AITA for moving on so quickly after my husband left me? My (47F) husband (47M) asked for a separation on our 14th anniversary, while we were away in a foreign country to celebrate. We decided to tie the knot as we were having a little girl together and are madly in love. Well, my husband took off around 7-8pm-ish to go grab beer, leaving Nate and the rest of the guys in the garage (except for John, who went with husband). We had a healthy sex life during the entire pregnancy, but he was cheating with someone from work. If he continues to do it, you won't cool. So, the night before last I had gotten no sleep. She asks if it's Christmas yet and we tell her not yet. I had JUST gotten the baby to sleep when all the sudden my home is literally shaking. ADMIN MOD. Here are some interesting facts about trust: Just want some advice. His sister messaged me asking if I had any plans for him this weekend and whether we would like to come and see her and have a “joint birthday get together” (she lives 5 hours away, round trip). His family are a very close knit group and although they are very kind and giving, it can also be overbearing IMO. Pick two nights a week that he eats with his Mom. She’s now supportive of my husband & I’s relationship. I asked my parents if I could use their cabin for a week next week and they said yes. Master-Parsley-7127. A few days after his sisters. My now husband Lucas (26) and I (F,25) were getting married. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I showed up to my husband's dr appointment. Four years ago I was looking through my husbands phone to find a recipe that he wanted me to make that he had his sister-in-law send him (honest). I suggested 3-4 days with his family No, fuck even that. the kids said they will just go to their dad since they and my husband are still not talking. She loves people. I turned 25 yesterday. She has a new apartment with a backyard and invited me and my parents all over for a bbq. I calmly told him the reason but he was pissed. But I thought to myself "well, at least she cooks for us!". update My husband just told us that he'll be spending christmas with his family saying he needs to be around his dad anyway. neither of the kids are happy with how things turned out. When my daughter was born her skin was very dark and looked like she could have two biological parents who were of African descendent. Me: “dude sit with your buddies, I’ll be fine”. He just got out 2 years ago and moved back to our home state 3 months back. Kids off playing video games. We go there over the winter to check on it and do any basic maintenance that is required. I knew I was late for dinner but I thought that my husband and his mom saved a plate for me. Say he's eating out 3 x's a week, that's $60 - $75 dollars per week, or $240 - $300 per month! $2,880 - $3,600 per year! AITA for not showing up for my birthday dinner at a nice restaurant knowing everyone was waiting for me and my parents had to pay a deposit for the table? I'm (16M) the second oldest of four. I also suggest a compromise. My husband Jim (26m), fake name, was furious and accused me of cheating and left right then and there. My husband and I own a lake house that we spend most of our free time at when it's warm. I don’t care if it is the saddest looking salad on the planet, I’ll order it just so there will be food in front of me and my husband can enjoy something he likes. We just found out this morning. He's pretty close with his sister Beth, (28) and they spend almost all week together. Help keep the sub engaging! I think OP’s approach is the right one. I have a good job and make a decent amount of money, whereas my husband made not as much as me. I was busy at work getting things done before I had to go away, and when I came home I saw that my husband had already packed our girls’ bags, which is something After my husband left for his brother’s bachelor weekend trip our son, who is 2, was very upset because he forgot to tell him that he loved him. My husband and brother’s relationship has been decent. According to Emily, my BIL (sister’s husband,) started to brag about their new “exotic maid” that they hired because of this event. Due to this, and the fact he was still living with his Jun 29, 2022 · A couple of hours later, the author got a call from husband revealing that he found a text from his manager claiming that he was fired. The most disappointing birthday I’ve ever had. My husband, Mike (37) is the eldest in his family. At times in our 8 year relationship, there have been times he has been a little on the heavier side, BMI of 27. So he said "yup, sorry I fucked up your day" and left to go get the baby. Fucking vibrating with the sound of a consistent, EXTREMELY loud ADMIN MOD. The man caused a scene and asked the woman whether she said anything that led him to do it. He said it’s his weekend, and he’ll come by the hospital Monday. NOT show up with your preferred dress and expect the bride will allow it. Our son is amazing and a pretty easy baby. My husband drives to the school to beg them to let him fill the forms out in the office. Not the A-hole. That was my first thought. My parents own a We're looking into options for groups and stuff that'll help her out, though my grandma's doing most of it. 7 years ago my husband and I both started new careers. Not gonna lie, if my husband spoke this way about me being in my own comfort in my own bedroom, I'd offer him to find a lovely room to sleep in on his own, cuz he ain't sleeping in mine. It was a huge ordeal that led up to it. My son already sleeps through the night which is a godsend. Little miss entitled princess needs to learn that she isn't the lifeblood to everyone, and thus she doesn't need to be praised on every event she "blesses" with her face. Anyways, I needed a vacation. Your brother and your husband's cousin are adults. I am the older sister of three (37f “L” and 35f “N”). Things started to change a couple months ago. I (F36) have a baby (10wks) with my husband (M36). AITA: For not continuing my reception after my husband went behind my back. My cousin attended the same high school as me and was in the same year, and was considered popular among our AITA for not showing up for my birthday dinner at a nice restaurant knowing everyone was waiting for me and my parents had to pay a deposit for the table? I'm (16M) the second oldest of four. I 30 F have 2 daughters and am currently pregnant with my 3rd girl. I said sure that sounds great, and that I had no plans for him this weekend I am now in a more senior position than my husband (M41) at work. The next day, and unbeknowest to me, He sent my boss a text using my phone pretending to be me telling him that I was at the hospital because I was having a miscarriage. AITA for showing off my baby in front of my infertile cousin? Not the A-hole. My husband has always told me how happy he was that I got the promotion. Girl if your guy won't stand up for your privacy and comfort, you have to. She went no contact with him after he took her first car and damaged ADMIN MOD. On the drive to my husband’s mothers house he explained how he was a bit disappointed about having a girl. Beth had issues with her father growing up. 19 votes, 236 comments. I ended up seated at a table where I couldn’t see his family. The guests arrived almost two hours earlier than Emily was expecting. He said "I'm really sorry I have to work on Valentine's Day". “N” is married to “P” (41m) and “L” is a widow. If she calls on other nights at the last minute, he can gracefully decline. Dump this baby, OP, and send him back to his mama so it's easier for him to stay attached to her breast. Family visits aren't vacations. My brother doesn’t care for him much and my husband treated him kindly. There are no winners in an argument between SO’s. I was super tired today. my husband and I have a 13 (almost 14) year old daughter (his step daughter, technically) and I absolutely refuse to allow my BIL around her. I have told him a billion times my brother will always be my priority. Throra334356. The kids are 7y. He’s been binge watching so many YouTube videos about di The correct title would be: “AITA for showing up at my ex’s wedding in a wedding dress”. I did not tell him AITA for asking my husband to stay with his family while he’s unemployed? Not the A-hole. This is where I might be the asshole. In my experience at least, all the steak houses we’ve been are used to accommodating people. He's eating 3 cheeseburgers to bulk up for a new side woman who has a thing for large men. Here’s how this would go in my marriage for comparison: Husband: “we’ll make it work financially so you can sit with me”. That hasn't stopped my ex from griping and dismissing my real pains. They feel I don't care and am showing lack of interest in his education and future. AITA for checking my daughters’ bags after my husband packed them? Asshole. And I’d also like to say, even though I have this complaint, I do think he’s a good father, and he’s a great husband. AITA for not wanting my husband to walk his sister down the aisle? Asshole. I asked my husband if he had anything to say. He ended up pinching his spinal cord and needing surgery. During this pregnancy, I've been very exhausted everyday and would usually come home from work and go to bed an hour later, then I'd My ex husband was cheating on me during my entire pregnancy and treated me exactly like OP's husband is treating her. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole. Last night, I was in the bedroom breastfeeding my son. Baby in her walker. My (36f) husband Ian (44m) is close friends with a woman named Jenna. My family also knew my marriage was very rocky. Overall-Candy-4513. Family, friends or complete strangers. Us men realize being a new mother is a 24/7 job. This is not your fight. I was pissed, exhausted, etc. I have two kids (twins 12m), “L” has one daughter (9f) and “N” has one son (8m). My extended family didn't know about the separation or about the pregnancy. I've told my husband and his ex-wife if they want their son to be homeschooled either she needs to come round while i'm working or they hire a tutor which i'd help pay for. 5 year old knows not to touch or open them. I’m always the one that has to initiate any Otherwise, identical. This place is about 3 hours away from my husband’s family. I could tell my dad was not telling me the whole story about the eviction so I pressed my mom and found out the truth 3 days ago. Help keep the sub engaging! I've told my husband and his ex-wife if they want their son to be homeschooled either she needs to come round while i'm working or they hire a tutor which i'd help pay for. But the second any of my husbands family come around, she's screaming from the time they show up and until they leave unless I physically leave the room with her. I didn’t make any plans for the actual day because it’s a Wednesday, but planned to throw a party at my house with my friends and family this Saturday. His mom is taking his side saying that I was a complete bitch for kicking him out. Jenna’s wife Laura very sadly and somewhat suddenly passed in early March (she was terminally ill but Oct 13, 2023 · It involves sharing one’s feelings openly, admitting mistakes without fear of backlash, and being honest about plans or whereabouts. Due to this, and the fact he was still living with his Otherwise, identical. So to give some context, I f35 have been married to my husband, m37 for 6 months. Anomalyyyyyyyyy. I ( Carla 30) am six months pregnant with my husband's ( Harry 31) baby. Maybe i'm an asshole as i'm putting my work above my stepson. We have a 7 year old daughter. For example, I am an English teacher and English is my first language, and his second. I (30f) have been married to my husband for almost seven years. If she doesn’t, then I’d strongly recommend counseling. You need to stay out of it, unless someone specifically asks you to step in. He agreed and supported me, fast forward to know my visa got accepted and I'm supposed to leave in two months. My toddler is showing more restraint than this 7 year old. Advice Needed. After the delivery I told the nurse he could come back into the room and he was fuming. Those are the types of steps your HUSBAND should’ve taken OP. Aita for explaining to my husband he’s the reason we keep having daughters. The baby was up until 4am and then I was woken up at 8am to the doorbell. It was supposed to be an opportunity to build team cohesion Long story short, my 16yo calls my husband after picking up her sister up saying she was crying because she can't go on her trip. " It was such a mockery to the health issues I've suffered and all I've put in to the family. My husband and I recently separated, and after that I found out I was pregnant. My husband isn’t a big fan of flying, though he has gotten better and tends to just hold my hand and close his eyes during take off and landing (mostly okay when in the air). Long story short, he sent me my last child support and alimony check. She said yes but not my husband. I was buying a house, he needed a place to live, moved into my spare room. Like I said, he was quite understanding. While we weren’t as close as we used to be, we almost never fought and generally enjoyed each others company and families. As my husband was preparing to leave, I got a call from my mother He ended up in prison for 12 years on kidnapping and r*pe charges. He went on to have numerous live in gfs and finally ended up married but not happily; he died of a heart attack when comparatively young - 62. Who, apart from the actual bride, goes and buys a dress for a wedding that has the term “wedding dress” in the name. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you. They didn't leave until well after 3pm. My older sister (18) has down syndrome and is medically complex, with complex needs. Basically, my SILs husband purposely tripped my 8yo son. AITA for making my husband miss his godmothers funeral? TW: Death, dying. My daughter yelled at my husband, "no touch, not Christmas yet!" AITA for ignoring my husband. He's still the love of my life and he says I'm his. I fly a lot for my job, so I have racked up a lot of miles. In the memo of the alimony check, he wrote " Freedom- good luck then. It is not set up for winter living. He isn’t a bad person, I just feel like this is something we’re struggling with right now. I can’t say much more. And 10y. I 29 f recently started working again after having my daughter (4m). In fact while I’m currently out of town he took my mom out to dinner. My son bashed his head off the wall and split his head open. . For instance, if your husband was supposed to be at a friend’s place but ended up somewhere else without prior communication, it might stir up feelings of distrust. So, I put the groceries on the table, packed a bag for the baby and told my husband "have at it, I'm going to Applebee's" and left. He said his mother had a point and it wouldn't hurt if I acted 'more like a proper woman' and 'took better care of my home and children'. About a week ago, my husband went to a family dinner that I wasn’t invited to. If you, bridesmaid, dont like the dress the bride chose for you to wear, you have 2 choices: suck it up and wear it or politely decline to participate. AITA for leaving my husband at our lake house with his family. 100% NTA but your in-laws and husband sure are. Husband: “no u”. I got pregnant at 17 a couple months before I graduated high school. A year after I divorced I agreed to a blind date where I met my now husband 38 yrs ago and we married 33 yrs ago. AITA for telling my husband to tell his mom to settle the baby. This thread is now locked due to an excess of rule violations. Help keep the sub engaging! The ol' "MIL hates me and excludes me from family events, totally not my fault btw, my husband is a doormat and I show up anyway, AITA teehee?" Someone should make a compilation of all the tales like this one. I also think context matters. Red or not, that’s a a wedding dress. She doesn’t have to ask a man to do it for her, like I do. It did bother me but it is what it is. MOD. LogicalBlueberry5. So earlier that day, I called and made a reservation at the restaurant they were going to. I thought he would forget about it and I did try to distract him but he was crying for hours over it and was refusing to sleep so I facetimed my husband in the hopes it would calm him down. AITA for embarrassing my husband in front of random strangers? My husband (31) told me last night that his boss asked him to pick up an extra shift today because of short staffing. He’s a very handsome chap. You're going on vacation. I was supposed to work, and my parents were lined up to watch our child (7y). Thankfully they let him since it was the same day. I handle feeding, diaper change, cleaning, wiping. One night, six months into the job, husband drunkenly tripped, fell, and hit his shoulder. I told my brother I was pregnant when we spoke on the phone before the wedding, he congratulated me and that was more or less it. I work long hours and it's a demanding job time wise. I pay for a phone for her so she can keep in contact with both of us, she's smart with it and its never been an issue before. Also, he's definitely cheating on you. Now. I could not believe it and for a minute thought it was a joke but seeing how my boss responded just confirmed it. I only get a few hours sleep so my husband's mom isn't really helping with the baby. She agrees that I gave aunt & uncle a chance to apologize and they didn’t. No A-holes here. My family has always had breakfast together, it’s how we started the day at home. My 2. He knew I'd be occupied at the doctor's office and took advantage. Obligotory English isn't my native language warning. o. Well, his family likes to show up to our house unannounced. We have sex maybe once a year since our daughter was born. •. It seems you two are going through a rough patch with a new born, it’s not going to help either of you to fight it out. He understood. He said tradition was tradition for a reason and it was kind of insulting that I thought I was too good for how he was raised. My husband says I’ve hurt his family’s feelings. Says that he figured I would appreciate socializing, since I never do. UGH, I hope not. If she’s telling him, someone who has been doing it for years, that it isn’t simple and takes a long time. You can be wrong without having to experience something. Would be a humoring read. To start out We've had gifts under the tree for many days now. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to… Hon your husband needs his facts checked and the sooner the better. My husband thinks that just because I wfh that I can pause whenever but it's UGH, I hope not. AITA for blowing up on my family after they came 30 min late to my birthday dinner. Standing up for yourself gives your wife cover if she also wants to do so. That should be the end of it. so I feel like things have gotten out of hand and the problem got bigger. Daycare is too expensive so my husband 35m reluctantly agreed to stay home. I grew up very differently, my family isn't near as close or overbearing. AITA for telling my husband he needs to step it up Forewarning, this may be kind of long. We have three boys, one 8 year old and a set of 15 month old twins. My (26F) husband (26) and I have been married for almost 2 years. My husband left the house, not knowing about my reservations, and I left 15 minutes after him. He has 2 children from two different (uninvolved) mothers and they live with us full time. AITA for “kidnapping” my baby, causing my husband to have a panic attack. AITA for not letting my SIL meet my infant (even though my husband wants her to)? Back 8 months ago my husband and I agreed to go no contact with my SIL (husbands sister). I and my ex split when our daughter (13) was about two, and have always had split custody, 50/50. For now, my little sister and I are moving in with my grandma, just to make sure Matt doesn't try anything. But sometimes I get the feeling that he’s embarrassed that I’m technically his superior now. In this case, OP's husband is choosing his family over his wife. My (35f) husband (45m) was supposed to attend the funeral of his godmother in his hometown, about 3. They’ve been friends for a long time, before Ian and I got together, so I know her fairly well too but we really have nothing in common and we’re not exactly friends. He was writing a report the other day and asked me if the word "nil" was spelt like "nill" or with one "l". I asked if I could bring the kids. However, if your husband is away from the home, working seven twelve hour days to make ends. At first, she says that she was overwhelmed, but nothing she couldn’t handle. Yeah, I'm glad husband stood up to his mom, but as a husband in a similar situation (NC with my own mother after she started shit in our house immediately after our twins were born), the rest of that description doesn't feel great, although maybe OP is also just feeling uncomfortable. So leading up to the wedding day Lucas told me that his best man (Jacob The same husband who made misogynistic comments is the most amazing husband anyone could ask for? The same husband who trashed you for not lifting a finger in front of others? The same husband who spread ba about how women everywhere are liars for saying being a sahm is hard? Yeah, definitely the most amazing husband anyone could ask for. Last night, we had a work-related social event. Me: “no u u”. “Oh ok I didn’t realize” you shouldn’t act like you know more than them and force them to prove you wrong. My husband (32) and I (30) have been married for just over a year now and things couldn’t be rockier. This was almost my exact wedding dress! ADMIN MOD. They have not told you for a reason. So he did this for him, not me. It’s my husband’s birthday next week. I showed my friends and they agreed he's To people asking where my mom is in all of this. He started demanding that I tell him why I kicked him out. We dated a couple of years. From the sounds of it, he's also a narcissist and teaching your sons to be misogynists. Examples are I'll ask to cuddle and watch TV or something and he'll throw a fit saying I'm clingy (specially if he's on the game but I don't ask unless he's been on there all day), I'll ask for back rubs that's like asking for him to grab me the moon with how he acts, I can't talk to him AITA for asking my husband to stay with his family while he’s unemployed? Not the A-hole. AITA for telling my husband to choose his PlayStation over our marriage…. Everybody in our families know about this plan, and everybody and I mean everybody says I'm an asshole for doing that to my husband, we are not going to have stability and I'm taking away time we should spend together and live together. Very manipulative of OP to just call it a pretty dress when she knew full well what she was doing. I called my husband to tell him and ask he come home ASAP - and he refused. Last night I decided I was going to show him how it feels vs tell him to see if he got the hint. But then he said “I should’ve expected this My husband has a habit - and I don’t even think he’s aware he does it - where he’ll make a “mountain out of a molehill” in public - usually at my expense. Tell him how you felt when you made the effort to prepare a nice meal and he decided to eat at Moms. Me: “nah we should save the money, it’s no big deal”. We broke up and stayed friends. I have an ex who lives in my house with my husband and I. ”. He receives benefits. She was alone working in the kitchen. Having been in this position, the only thing that worked was sitting my husband down and actually showing him the numbers. Ok so me and my husband have been married for a while but its like he don't want to show me any attention. That's too damn far to even be worth thinking about. I’ve been having a hard time r/AmItheAsshole. I apologized profusely. I was subject to relentless bullying from classmates, teachers random adults. 5 hours away. I told him this was never about my lack of social life but my lack of spending time with him and I had told him that when I had talked to him about it a week ago. Maybe 20 minutes later he calls and says "I washed the dishes, sorry. AITA for wanting to divorce my husband for trying to cheat. This was almost my exact wedding dress! My ex wouldn't. " I told him that's zero excuse at all. AITA? Hello. Husband: “just take my seat, I’ll sit in coach”. Harry and I have been married for a year and two days and I'm pregnant with our first child. The store is only 5 minutes away. You are the kinda the AH. AITA for waking up my husband? I (39f) “J” am married to my husband “C” (40m) for 14 years, together for 20. If she wore it to prom or a quinceñera then I’d be like “oh that’s fine, that’s a cute dress,” but an adult woman wearing it to a wedding is insane-especially her ex’s wedding. I’d tell my wife, her sisters, and her parents that this situation is intolerable. Her husband also has a son our daughters age. It might be the only way that you can bridge the gap between the 2 of you. (In the basement even) I dated a couple of other guys along the way, met my now husband. The problem is that my husband never takes my word for it or believes me about anything unless he has solid proof. She won't. She said that she told him the truth, but the husband lashed out stating that he was “cooking up” an excuse to get My ex husband was cheating on me during my entire pregnancy and treated me exactly like OP's husband is treating her. NTA. It’s important to know that he’s been unemployed since 2021. He hasn’t talked to me in a week. My ex remarried when our daughter was five, and now has two younger kids. My (36F) husband (39M) and I are going on a brief vacation with our daughters (twins, 5 yo). Posted by u/throwaway2204729 - 38,269 votes and 2,344 comments YTA for pushing your way into a situation you admit neither you nor your wife know nothing about. I [33F] recently married my husband [30M] and we took a 3 hour flight to Mexico for our honeymoon. My husband knew this when we started dating. Today for example we went to the local shop and he took the basket to the front and reminded me me needed some dog biscuits, now usually on a big shop there is a bag we buy but this . Rhewin. So same, mum would wake us up even in high school :) My parents live by themselves now - mum needs to be out by 7:15, my dad (retired) gets up with her, cleans up afterwards and often goes back to bed afterwards. He was my "getting my feet wet" after divorce bf. The sun doesn't shine out of her @ss, and she doesn't get a honorary participation award for showing up. You're showing far more class than any of them. Our phones were never something we kept from each other and he ADMIN MOD. He was immediately apologetic for the discrepancy and determined to prove to me that he could be a better partner to me and to show my family the person I’d fallen in love with. And I love my husband more than anything in this world, but I still really do look up to my sister. I was very pissed. They can feel free to toughen up. His friends lied for him. RecognitionDecent366. Mom and Matt do not have a choice, and my grandma is an amazing wordsmith, so she'll make sure nobody tries to stop us. aj wf rt sn qf du yk wm xa lb